this short-lived tv show, which is really an entirely baffling Flava Flav vanity project, casually suggested that the apocalypse will be indulgent and fun in a really horrible way.
I was 6 in 2006, but it's still hard for me to imagine that flava flav was, even back then, a particularly luminescent star. even at their peak, he never seemed to be Public Enemy's burning star core. while his "greatest hype man in the music business" claims are still undisputed, the show never ceases to feel like an owed favor by some shady executive. i personally suggest becoming a little drunk and watching S1E01 in its 40-minute entiretym as it's probably the most entertaining show ever made, but here are some starter moments:
[3:34]
Flava Flav: "Sometimes, Flava Flav gets lonely."
Flava Flav attempts a full-court shot and misses. The ball bounces off the garage roof, cue shattering glass sound effect.
[9:06]
In a troublingly Orwellian move, Flava Flav renames woman living in the c̶o̶m̶p̶o̶u̶n̶d̶ mansion. Allegedly it is to assign nicknames that he can remember.
[10:54]
"Pumkin" grabs Flava Flav's ass as they hug.
Flava Flav: "How does it feel grabbing that broomstick back there?"
Pumkin (nervously): "Good."
Flava Flav (proudly): "I got no butt. There's nothing but a broomstick. I'm telling you, you might get a splinter in your finger."
Both Flavor of the Month and Belle Delphine are cynical, enjoyable, and pretty confusing. becoming immersed in the worlds they offer is disorienting in the same way listening to a beach boys album can be, where the fundamental attitude of what is valuable and what is necessary feels so radically out of touch, and so relentless in its pursuit, that you either are constantly aware of its cluelessness or forced to abandon your own bearings. their 1970 album Sunflower certainly gets attention for inventing chillwave but not enough for nesting some pretty stunning songs. Are the lyrics unbearably bad & uninspired as is usual for the Beach Boys? Yes! Does someone do an almost-unlistenable "soul brother" voice on "Gotta Know the Woman"? YES!! Would these all be better as instrumentals? Of course!!!!!
However, the arrangements and production is absolutely off the chain. Maybe the loveliest moment in any Beach Boys song ever— yes, this is a wild claim— is the candid and haunting piano reverie that closes out "Tears in the Morning." So much Brian-crisis-era Beach Boys in marked by an odd playfulness that is eerily devoid of humor, like they heard the delightful Beatles outtakes and tried to engineer their own. this is especially upsetting because we've heard them have real genuine fun, and it rules. so "Cool Water," which features such inconceivable lyrics like,
"In an ocean or in a glass / Cool water tastes like such a gas,"
has extremely pleasant harmonies and a nice foley rhythm track of droplets, in addition to tasteful prepared piano. But what the fuck? Tastes like "such a gas"? What other fringe 60s vernacular like "such a gas" didn't make it to Mad Men?
overall it is an essential listen, if only to remind you that: too much earnestness can be a bad thing, or at least one that plunges you into uncanny valley. the sincerity of Sunflower is frequently too much to handle. if only belle delphine were to show up and drop some bars.
PS
here's a short bonus review of Billy Joel's fabulous Nylon Curtain album from '82 which I listened to 4 consecutive times at work the other day:
- someone ought to liberate "Allentown" from Billy, who maniacally births songs into captivity with his uncanny airtight productions and hammy vocal takes. allentown is kind of a gorgeous song.
- "Goodnight Saigon," of course, is more late 70s/early 80s misguided valorizing of Vietnam.
- "Laura" is another entry into Beatlesdom, with "Don't Pass Me Buy" drums and Abbey Road guitar, but is unnvervingly spiteful in a way that most Billy Joel songs are.
- "Scandanavian Skies" is fucking cool, and what modern orchestrations!!
